This is me at 15-years-old old trying to drive a very-not-race-spec 1983 Prelude with my dad in the passenger seat.

I'm just mad at him for leaning on the car / paint.

A/C just needs a charge.

Well, if she thinks "fucking" is a kiss on the cheek, I don't think I want to match with her.

This takes me back to my youth, where on one of the many days I was tennis'ing spiritedly against our garage door, I put everything I had into a backhand...and had it hit off a basketball hoop pole and immediately/directly into my youthly junk.

I would have won America's Funniest Videos for the week if someone had…

This is how I imagine every 370Z track day ending.

Perhaps they'll all be returned in a week's time with brand new head gaskets, as a civil service to local car-oblivious hipsters.

"You'll see that as either being overpriced, but I see it as about right for what it is now: a small, front-wheel drive BMW hatchback. And BMWs aren't cheap when it comes to base prices or options."

I would never see it as a BMW anything. I would say that's like saying you'd see the GTI as an Audi hatchback, but the…

To be fair to Dave Bidini, Canadian soldiers probably do wear hockey jerseys in battle.

My current GF:

Some fan bases like enforcers more than others. I think the Hawks are one of the teams he'd be least likely to find love from fans, as it kind of harkens back to the painful Dollar Bill dead teams of the latter 90s / early 00s where all the team had was a hope to injure Yzerman. Now that they actually have skill…

"You like lager."

The craft beer surge speaks against this, at least in America. We need big, crazy flavors! Märzen gets a pass because it's still "trendy" to like Oktoberfest, but all other lagers are to be met with such reviews as "I mean, no! It's good! It tastes....I don't know how to say it. I think it…

Quick, someone photoshop some camo covering on that chassis!

"The second-gen Acura NSX: developed back when there were books"

We can all agree that Travis is the weirdest steering wheel gripper in the history of jalops.

And then I swoop in with a tertiary correction to point out it should be 9 and 3.

In a breaking news follow-up, Channel 4 News has learned that Roger Goodell has found Chicago Bears CB Tim Jennings "guilty, guilty, guilty" and has executed him on the spot, and eaten his heart for what little powers he had.

A heated seat that takes 15 minutes to warm up is a heated seat that isn't worth anything.

BMW M4 owner hops a curb: 100% of Jalops descend, Jalop writer that had coined a term for rolling a car makes it a personal mission to shame as furiously as possible

Subaru owner wrecks doing improper snownuts: Ohhhhhh, guys, this is a real important lesson about tires (which evidently according to the driver, he had…

But I can't turn it off and do the job the proper way - I'm knock-kneed and can only "twist" my foot clockwise when my knee is bent, not any bit counter-clockwise past 12 o'clock.

:(