He is lacking hair.

I'm glad I found this, my science oven is filthy.

I don't see the need to rudely reply to what a guy chooses to keep in his bag. It's not like he's telling you that you should be carrying the same stuff. It's nothing to get worked up over.

An 8 month preggo swinger. How do you live that one down?

I believe in you Greg the Mad.

I don't think people who shoot down civilian aircraft are really that concerned with spoiling a crime scene. I'm not at the level of international war criminals so I could be giving a bum scoop.

Did I ever tell you about the time Ron Paul took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally, Ron takes me into a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' Well, we sat there for a year and a half. Sure enough, someone constructed a bar around us. Well, the day they opened…

"Hey Chief, did I get my face paint right?"

MCRD Parris Island, I pissed in troughs with 30 other swinging dicks for 3 months straight. It leads to a very efficient movement of piss.

That's right up there with "Crab cakes and football! That's what Maryland does!" except this guy is serious.

George Foreman punches like he's chopping wood. Bad intentions.

He looks like that member everyone observes at the local swim club. They are so tanned, boozed soaked and bleached you can't tell if they are female or male.

That's a two tissue photo

Love this post. I'm into Paleo and all the primal stuff. I've taken to rubbing myself down with fresh olive oil and working out naked like the ancient Greeks. The quality olive oil costs a little bit more per gallon than the sports clothing would cost me but it's all natural. The only issue I run into is it's hard to…

Never fight a land war in Asia

My wife hates it. She also thinks James Taylor has an awful voice. This is probably why I cheat on her.

Steve Harwell in a Gorilla Biscuits hoodie?!?!?

I am deeply upset he's wearing a Minor Threat t-shirt. What's next, Scott Stapp in a Chain of Strength shirt?!?!??!

I filled up my screens with windows of my normal job functions then screen grabbed it and made it my background. My boss always thinks I'm working. I usually just find novel ways of wasting time like counting my toes and seeing how many joints I can make crack while seated.

He pulls a lotta water in that town