Eli.... Eli never changes. 

Because a runner is considered to already be in possession of the ball.

Irony of ironies, South American football players get in hot water for handjobs while some American professional football coaches prefer footjobs.

get your hands off those danguses

There’s really nothing remarkable here. Lots of athletes take time out of their schedule to visit retarded children.

I pity whoever wakes up next to James Harden, because there is not an inch of that bed that he didn’t shit all over.

Death. Penalty. Now.