Obligatory reference to the only minimalist keyboard you’ll ever need:

What, he didn’t follow up his 5-star performance of “Green Eggs and Ham” in the Senate with a rousing rendition of “Fox in Socks”? I mean, it’s the RNC. There’s bound to be some tweedle beetles fighting in a tweedle beetle battle. All we need is to get them some paddles, and a puddle in a bottle. Maybe some poodles…

This is some weak-sauce ARG shit. I still remember the radio update in Portal, where the solution was found by taking dozens of audio files from radios added to the game (the update for which was the only clue that a puzzle might be happening), converting them into images using WWII radio techniques, putting the…

Keeping this game alive after 25 years? This really is a link to the past.

You may not have liked the Lego Movie, but money talks, and the Lego Movie is hella loud.

And here’s a perfect example of someone who copy/pastes the same response to two different people because he’s not sure anyone else in the world will read what he says.

Time to find me some Snorlax.

Hey, you’ve never had to shift the boys around, then realize that you’re at the RNC and say eff it, I’m on too big a stage and can’t grab my junk, so you never notice that your fly is down.

I’m glad that old man Cena has found his place in the New Era: confused as fuck about all these youngsters and their catchphrases. One can only hope that some day, some way, John Cena will figure out how he is doing.

I dunno, festering ass is not very tasty. In fact, it...

Ass consumption is a serious matter, sir.

Question. What if, hypothetically, a fraudster has become sated after a hearty meal of n00b tears and x-treem game fuel, and therefore cannot consume the entirety of their own ass? I believe that the proper procedure is to force-feed them ass, but is it also allowable to save a portion of the ass in Tupperware in the…

They’ve had a bad day, so they’re sad and trying to hide under his pecs.

As far as serious Joker motivation (Romero, Nicholson, etc are goofy jokers), this is the best theory I’ve heard. I think it was from a recent comic, but I don’t remember.

Son of a bitch, people. VGBC is just getting back into sponsoring people. This probably won’t impact their tournament-streaming business, but I hope it doesn’t make things go bad for Chudat or Amsa.

Of course, they didn’t remove the tweets where the name of the city looked like it was approval. “80 dead in terrorist attack #nice.”

Wait, Melee is slow? Which game are you watching? Melee is hella fast. Some characters are slower because they are defensive, but that’s by no means unique to Melee, or even Smash.

The new Pokemon Glockachu is super effective against, like, everything.

More than any other fighting game, Melee, and Smash 4 to a lesser extent, are much more innovative games. Not because the games are innovative (well, they kind of are), but because the actual gameplay had to be innovated. There isn’t a common string of moves in Street Fighter named after Daigo or Justin Wong (there is…

Holy shit, but he looks like my brother. That is kinda scary.