(Read in the voice of Morgan Freeman or David Attenborough.)

Nah, we just grow ‘em bigger up here.

But we can’t have four, because then he would have one on each limb, and Bayonetta kinda did that with guns. Gotta keep innovating.

Woah, hold on there, man. I mean, it’ll probably have a hookshot, but I won’t be satisfied unless it has two hookshots.

Well, if there’s no fans in the seats, it’s probably not a Lynx game.

As most chase scenes are. Otherwise, the lesser participant would just turn on him. But the chase was supposed to end, like, 15 seconds into the video.

WoW isn’t as “flashy” as other MMOs. It’s like explaining why good football plays are good to people that aren’t invested in football. There’s a level of metagaming and skill involved that we have to accept is present.

You misspelled Drumpf.

Imagine that you and your friend are at one of those restaurants that has some crazy eating challenge. Like, a 12 pound pizza. Now, you and your friend have been training. You’ve been eating big food for months, years even. Your tactics are ready to go. You get to the pizza. You start eating it.

Because Kaepernick will cause less drama than Manziel.

Guys, I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s just a little corporate sponsorship from places like GameStop, your number 1 location for pre-ordering games. I always pre-order my games there, because they have great service and knowledgeable employees. Pre-order at GameStop today!

You misundertand me. You are assuming that I didn’t enjoy it. I did enjoy it. I would have enjoyed it a little more if there wasn’t so much time-wasting spent going back and forth to find all the puzzles.

Wow, JJ, I believe you. Just like I believed that Cumberbatch’s character in Star Trek: Into Darkness wasn’t going to be Khan.

What, no love for the PSP squirrels? I still want a hit of whatever they were on.

Well, butts. If I decide to be one of those crazy completionist people, at least it’ll be at a brisk jog.

Now don’t all spit-take at once, but...

That takes the boat’s speed up to “stroll” rather than “walk”.

Your Fire Joe Morgan is showing again.

This is Fez all over again, but with more pen-and-paper puzzles, and much slower because the game world is huge and there’s no fast travel. Yes, there is travel, but I dare you to describe it as “fast.”

The Hypoglycemic Rhyme Chamber?