Easy! Move 13 hours away from all of them. That’s what I did.

Being an asshole will only get you what you want at an Apple store.

I worked at Lonestar Steakhouse years and years ago as a waiter. I had three guys come in once, probably in their mid-twenties. They were the ones who graduated college, but never really let go of the frat boy attitude. They each ordered the smallest sirloin on the menu, but gave me this instruction on how to cook…

Yikes! I’m happy to say I’ve never experienced anaphylaxis. I’m not allergic to any foods.

I’ll 100% agree with that! Just kind of a pain to pretty much have to take the next day off of work because all I did was get a shot, but yes, better than tetanus. Last time I had to get it was when my wife was pregnant, they made us both get the Tdap. She was totally fine and I was miserable the next day.

Damn tetanus shots put me down for an entire day. Generally the day after the shot. Whole body hurts, can barely move. Hate that damn shot.

If there is seating at the venue, do not be an asshole when the people who purchased those seats show up and want what they paid for.

Don’t waste your time trying to figure out what you did wrong after she left. She’s the one who cheated and left you. Don’t take 7 years to realize you weren’t the problem.

It’ll be a cold day in hell before I recognize Missourah!

I guarantee anyone who just read the word “Battletoads” nodded in agreement before they read the story. God damn that game.

Well, that Pyrex set just completed what I need from the last time there was a big Pyrex deal.

Well, that Pyrex set just completed what I need from the last time there was a big Pyrex deal.

Bought that Pyrex set so fast. Our tupperwear set is really old.

Bought that Pyrex set so fast. Our tupperwear set is really old.

Imo's Pizza (Arch Pizza if you're in Denver) and toasted ravioli.

LOL I'm 35 and I drink a gallon of milk every 2-3 days. I've never broken a bone and I've only had 3 cavities in my life (I know there are other factors, but calcium is one of them).

This is incredibly helpful, thanks for posting! Now I feel better about walling up my unfinished basement.

Shut up. Hard "g" GIF. I don't care what the creator of the .gif says, if he wanted "jiff" he should have galled them .jif. PERIOD.

Not done yet and I'm 35 years old. Probably about $2,000 left. Wife got out of grad school a year ago, and on top of her bachelor's, we'll be paying that off until we die.

I'm debating moving to a solid blue state. I love Colorado, but I get so pissed at how purple it is most of the time. Still beats living in deep red Missouri, that's for damn sure.

That Slender vid never gets old.