They all died at the end of The Moon and Antarctica. I like some of the later songs, but they don’t have the same elements of acidhead freakout and the simultaneous longings for both life and death.

Huh. In order to counteract last night’s twee Sufjan Stevens’ song, tonight I’m posting a chunk of Bukowski that reminds you that life is even worse than you thought. (And it’s under a Modest Mouse post. Who would wanna be?)

A bad pun, but a bad triple pun, and still nothing?

You bombed.

Future NY Post cover when Yanks and Mets fans pitch a fit:

Any beating you would have gotten would have been your own fault.

Sufjan Stevens?

I’ve always refused to play fantasy football for a lot of reasons. This year, I figure I should play one year so I can better explain to myself why I hate it.

“Frustrated with Kelly’s offense? So am I.”

You’re so far out of your depth. You can’t even comprehend that which you yourself wrote. Go back to 4chan. I have other things to do with my life.

Or the Redskinks:

If you can’t understand that ending up 12-1, with the 12th win coming over an undefeated team is more impressive than sitting around Norman and doing nothing at 11-1, then there’s no convincing you.

Welker had the ball spotted on the 2. That’s only the equivalent of a 19-yard FG.

I’m from the Rust Belt myself (8th largest city in 1910!), so, unfortunately, I know exactly how apt this analogy is.

You’re missing my point though: you only go to the dropkick if your placekicker gets hurt.

Here’s my contribution: diluted ketchup instead of tomato sauce on pasta, covered with home-shredded government surplus cheese. MMMMM-MMMMM. At least with terrible sauce made from a tiny can of generic tomato paste, you can escape the vinegar, but not with diluted ketchup! It’s more pain for the sores in your mouth.…

I’d like to think that the entire city of Buffalo is just trolling Deadspin.

Then have someone else practice it. It’s a long story, but I ended up briefly playing I-AA ball at a small school as an offensive lineman, but, as a kid, I at least placed, and sometimes won, the local PPK competition for my age group.

Jacksonville could have benefited from this strategy yesterday.