Hot take, asshole.

Austyn Crites is the guy. He’s doing interviews, you guys should totally ask him about the Redskins and Indians.

Whatever, micropenis. Come at me, Harambe!

My Mom and Dad are lifelong teacher’s union democrats and they put a goddamn Trump sign in their yard. For every story about people turning there is a story about a turn the other way.

Hidden bag of Reese’s peanut butter cups behind the stereo. Woot!

Man, five and still can’t find a good job in a mill.

My roommate dressed as me for Halloween back in college! I was incredibly flatterbarrassed.

Sleep tight, Yogi.

No, they’re Brazilian, I think.

Nerd rap.

Heck yeah. It’s too bad some comics aren’t required reading in school. Imagine some of the insane stuff we would get to see! Also, wouldn’t it be great to hear Diesel explain his entire vision of the riddick galaxy? I’d watch that documentary.

A box with four stones in it!

Chronicles of Riddick pulled it fairly well.

Trifluoroacetic acid is one the most important cleavage cocktails in solid phase peptide synthesis

Jezibeltaku.

Pffft. Millenial. Gonna tell me the Styrofoam planes were better than balsa?

Man, so much edge. Go tell your myspace friend, tila, how much edge you have.

Go in for a lot of left hand shakes?

A bathroom theme with rockets and planet names and not a mention of Uranus.