I think #2 falls under ‘missionary work’

The only thing worse in Mike Pence’s mind would be talking to any woman that isn’t his wife.

Real news

Why the fuck is the president defending a fucking shitty television host and shitty fucking author of shitty fucking books?!

Big fan of Jimmy

Those are names of corporations made by adults?!

the greatest thing

Every time.

Did he visit Spain? I hear Parliment wants to take on the Spanish fleet and Make The UK Great Again

There’s also something to be said about waiting until the last minute to share your concerns about an event that gets planned every year.

That phone is entirely too complicated for him to understand.

Just keep this in mind: whatever you think a reasonable person would do to better the country as a whole Donald Trump will do the exact opposite and then blame everyone who isn’t him when it goes south.

I sincerely love what Trump is doing with putting his family in every aspect of running the White House. Why? Because he’s providing the best argument against government being run like a business.

They’re useless for you. If you’re a corporation or wealthy they’re very useful.

When a US citizen gets married to a non-US citizen, their spouse has to apply for a green card. It doesn’t just show up with the marriage license.

I can’t wait for Matt Walsh’s kid to grow up to be a gay liberal

Hmmm that’s a good point. I think maybe Celeste will grab Jane’s gun from her purse and shoot Perry in the dick. It’s only fitting.

Like if the creepy robot baby from Twilight grew up

Which Ed totally already has (because he wants to to bone Hippy Yogi so bad).