Is this bedroom on a second floor? Who carried Arianna up there?

He chokes out a guy in front of her and doesn’t continue the proposal right then and there? Romance is dead.

Pretty close, after about the 125th time the bully has embarrassed their SO or the 200th time they’ve made fun of the SO for something they like that is different from their own.

Hi, have we met?

My cat will walk over, meow at me to follow him to where the insects are.

My cat won’t even bat at ants that come into my apartment, let alone take out a lizard or some kind of weird poisonous marsupial or whatever else they have down there.

Mine is a grocery store on a Sunday afternoon.

The entirety of Kerry’s campaign was “Why didn’t he just say the exact thing he should have said”.

LET ME BE CLEAR: I don’t think Jidenna approves of slavery or slave-owners in any way, shape or form. However, TELL ME I’M WRONG. JUST TRY.

Yeah. Fuck black men that dress nice. Clearly he wants to be a plantation owner. That MUST be it.

This was a former boss of mine to a T: a gossip who complained about everybody, saw herself as the savior of the place (even though she was doing little to no work to improve things), undercut my ideas behind my back after she had okayed them to my face and rarely gave me any feedback unless it was negative. I was…

Can we please get his stance on the vacuum cleaner? This is a wedge issue for me.

To be fair, if I were Natalie Portman I wouldn’t want to be seen as anything close to a spokesperson or expert on the Middle East or Israeli foreign policy by the media in any way, shape, or form unless I was willing to be constantly barraged by fanatics and people who give death threats.

Somewhere right now someone is looking at their Quiznos sandwich and thinking “Shouldn’t there be more stuff in this?”

Alternately: Hola! Yo soy Heb! Bienvenidos Wal-Mart!

I can’t wait for him to take a job working the counter at Quiznos while he’s president. Wouldn’t want to be called lazy!

....but cool enough to compete, give him ad revenue and take his prize money.

Are you assuming that there was a magic amount that there were going to stop at? Because they all plan on out-fundraising the other candidate to win the presidency.