Sadly, this is accurate. He plays for the Vikings.

I don’t want to disrupt your other thread about overheating, so I will say here how much I love you for starting that. Sadly, I cannot come up with something similarly witty to join in.

A girl I went to elementary school with had a dad that was a doctor. Their last name? "Love"

Umm, I may have gone to school with you. If Canyon Vista rings an uncomfortable bell, well, we were in German together.

They thought it would be impolite to take off their shoes in public.

Rarely do I think someone should get the Lisbeth Salander "I AM A SADISTIC PIG, A PERVERT, AND A RAPIST" treatment, but this is one of those occasions.

You should tell this story more. Maybe this should follow the epic "Eldritch-gets-punched-in-the-face-in-college" story.

While I was in college a little over a decade ago, one of my professors (early 30s) got engaged to an undergrad student. This student was in his mid 30s, had been serving in the armed forces, and was attending college to begin a new career after his honorable discharge. She did have him as a student first, but they…

Hushed, polite applause.

FOR THE LAUGHTER PART OF YOUR BRAIN!

Kitchenette's new tag line should be "GLUTEN... IT'S CARCASS FREE!"

For the mouth part of your face!

I wish this was true. I used to work in food service. I know better. I don't have the stories or the writing style (from the brain part of my head) worthy of publishing here, but I have seen enough to believe this wasn't an isolated incident.

I have you to thank for the inspiration.

Drifting in the void

"If you think that's a bit much for you, skip ahead to Jesse Layton's story, which is a little gross, but at least it doesn't involve any ballsacks. Consider yourself warned."

Kind of like herpes.

I am 5'7 and 145 lbs. My brother is 6'2 and 265. You wouldn't know we are brothers until we start talking to each other. We have almost the exact same voice tone and pattern.

What are the odds Kluwe has already received a phone call?