The last time such violence was doled out by a Cane, Ray Lewis lost his best white suit.

Leroy Hoard who had an all-time fat back quote: “If you need one yard, I’ll get you three. If you need five yards, I’ll get you three.”

Unfortunately he fell into section 108 which is strictly reserved for any citizens who voted for the new park in Cobb County.

It was probably some kind of breaststroking that led to his freestyle story, but the butterfly effect of telling his mother is now causing him to go into full backstroke mode.

[Runs around corner, out of breath]

This fake first prize was miles better than second place - 2 tickets to 5 home games this next season - or third place - 2 tickets to every home game this season.

Greexit.

Tanked off of two Bud Light Platinums is really something you’d expect from a GT student not a UGA one.

“Now, Russ. I’m not just your football coach. I’m your life coach! I want you to stay positive and upbeat. I want you to go in there and melt her panties right off of her. I want you to be the carefully controlled and highly orchestrated explosions to her steel beams.”

Actual 2-minute drill.

#notalltakes

As relevant: I have also checked out of the Charlize Theron sweepstakes.

Carmelo looks like he’s going for that free team buffet.

Milk

Tough, but fair.

This was an obvious fake. No Bleacher Report writer ever strays that far from Mom’s basement.

It’s almost hard to believe we had even 33% possession. If you didn’t know any better, it looked like we were a man down for the entire 90 minutes.

I never liked the Celtics, but seeing KG leave my team and win a championship in Boston actually put a tear in my eye. (I understand this is sort of cheating, but oh well.)

Beautiful.