no, when your enemy is shelling their own position, that is a silver lining.

don't you see? now we're all in agreement! we can proceed with impeachment hearings now.

while I have never been able to suck my own cock, I have in the past, with much effort and exertion, been able to touch the tip of my tongue to it.

is it still a sheetcake if it's layered?

TO BE FAIR: why would they think Jesus Christ would ever be on their side?

well I think the reactions against KD Lang and the Dixie Chicks had a chilling effect on country stars who might otherwise have expressed liberal viewpoints. the message was clear: keep your mouth shut about politics that are left of center, or you better hope you have a lot of crossover appeal, cause you'll be…

I suspect a lot of country stars, past and present, are a lot more liberal than their fanbases.

John Carter of Cash not pictured for disappointing box office returns.

ahh, the immortal words of Hannibal.

I was in a bar on my birthday with my ex, picking out some songs on the jukebox, and I go "ooh, ZZ Top…" because I wanted to explore some of their earlier straight-ahead Texas blues. but she gave me a weird look, and I knew why: she was picturing synths, cheap sunglasses, and fuzzy guitars. I didn't even try to…

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

a guy who was in some great bands in the 60's, but didn't have too much all that interesting to say on his own, and coasted for a lot of years.

I'm out of touch, and even I know that's already a dated reference!

you're right, we can afford to reject new allies.

oh shit, I called it from the start: first presidency to end in a no-confidence vote!

crying into his scotch and fingering the button.

he would run that Arby's into. the. ground.

the Onion's Kelly cartoons are seldom quite this immediately topical, but that would make a great one!

"ConFURvatives"? like conservative furries? oh jesus christ, that just totally explained Ted Cruz…

well, there is more variety than that. there's all kinds of smaller budget fare to choose from too. covering a wide gamut of topics. plus, there's Peak TV. it not like they're the only thing out there.