YES. Fuck fawning over it. I wanna see how it handles the road.

I never walk into their stores but I see the hip, slender women about town toting their bags around and the sayings on it make me want to vomit. Have you read their bags?

Was your home a cardboard box under the freeway?

"And here with us today to talk about flight 370 is CNN's necromancy correspondent..."

If they were just going to make easy references to their own movies, they should have had a scene where they take turns eating out Natalie Portman.

Yeah, I remember the moment when it dawned on me that the real story of Lot was that he offered up his two young daughters to be raped by a frenzied mob and that this was why God decided he alone was moral enough to save. Then his wife looked back as the only home shed ever known was destroyed in fire and brimstone…

This comment is like the Rita Hayworth of comments. So beautiful.

Let's all take a moment to appreciate Oklahoma's method of crowd control: half-heartedly rolling a bicycle at people.

Crease violation!

"...exposed a young woman's genitals..."

"It tasted a lot better than it looked, though."

That's why most CEOs are female and women makes more money than men doing the same job.

In other words, the ability to think critically. A skill that's as valuable as it is rare, these days...

Hi, I'm Turbotastic and this is This Internet Life.

They should just come up with a marketing name, then everyone will be happy.

Cocaine makes you beautiful.

My mama, when she was pregnant with me, went from flat as a board at 5 months to HOLY FUCKING BUMP at 6 months. Pregnancy is so weird.

How on EARTH is she 5 months pregnant?! Jesusmaryjoseph—I had a bump within weeks. Just goes to show that there is no pregnancy standard!

I don't use my microwave much, I don't own a toaster oven. I do however own a toaster that has 2 settings (the dial is just there for looks apparently) "pale toast" and "take the battery out of the smoke detector"
I want a toaster revolution!