Tricky Dick Nixon

I'd settle for a Pinwheel, tbh.

I am equal parts deeply terrified and intensely inquisitive about discovering what a Klondike Bar might have warranted.

Dr. Shark Bird is gonna fuck up alla y’alls shit.

Watch out where the Malamutes go.

I would never enjoy a pokey bum wank to the smooth sound of Mr. Barry White.

Me too, but tbh, its not an assumption without the weight of history behind it.

The best part of the deal will be watching the looks on those idiots' faces when the short-fingered vulgarian turns his back on them should, god forbid, he be elected. Their world? Ain't never coming back.

Yeah, she should quit stalin’ and form a troika.

2 2 Chicken.

This is the way a life should be lived.

Newsletter?

I used to do this all the time on the old Webpersonals, treating it like an online game of Madlibs. I was in search of a woman who could display human-like emotions and had a shiny metal exoskeleton. Instead of talking about dates I told horrible tales from my past. Understandably, Webpersonals did not have much…

Brinkofdoom.

If you're gonna insinuate, we prefer "Rootless Cosmopolitans".

Some smooth Retsina, perhaps?

So much for the Audi TT.

Rob Kardashian

Schrodinger's Cop?

You forgot Cracker Barrel.