She's not pretty? What standards are they using to determine that? And I love her wit.

Step 1: Don't have kids.

I do this for the shade gifs

Blanc is an enormous dickhead, even by the standards of the pickup artist field, a field that's crowded with dickheads, a field that is really more dick than field.

What is sarcasm? How does it work?

Consensual sex in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation.

Trust me: they are.

Really? Ring crevices are caked with dirt and literal shit. I don't think food prep workers should be able to wear hand jewelry because it sounds really unsanitary. Fuck the gloves, just don't wear stuff that holds filth.

Shit, guys, when Gorman got his face eaten, I squealed with delight. Pure, utter delight at comeuppance. Especially since the eater was his previous victim.

She has a cold. Unfortunately, for her, the cure is worse than the disease.

"Is there an opinion so bad even Amanda Fucking Palmer can't hold it"

But here's what I'd like to see, her differentiating herself as a businesswoman from this twee persona. Listen, lady is a master MASTER sales and PR person. And I wish she'd admit to that instead of constantly going on and on in interviews about "baking with her girlfriends*." Do a grown-up businessperson interview…

Plus my favorite Disney movie, Fantasia, was basically Mickey Mouse on acid.

This woman needs to lose custody of her minor children. No joke, no exaggeration.

I feel a great disturbance in the Tort, as though millions of HIPAA compliance officers suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

Beats, shoots and leaves.

By all means, these guys can date who they want to date. I don't think Jezebel or Jezzies are saying they should not BE ALLOWED to date whoever they want, and I'm not sure where you got that from.

P.S. When guys say they wouldn't want a woman firefighter dragging them out of a burning building, I make sure to tell them to write it on their foreheads so I know to leave them there when I find them.

I wish there were a word to describe food that's non-industrial, small-batch, and generally made with care and attention by a human person, but without the twee, vomitous affectation that artisanal has. Because I am, by and large, a fan of a****anal food. Lots of it is good and interesting and worth putting in your…

Well, that explains why the blogger was anonymous. Because apparently authors are fucking nuts.