No graphic equalizer, no deal.

It could be worse for Pistorius. The most inhumane punishment would have been forcing him to represent his country at the 2016 Summer Olympics.

as a Pirates fan, I would probably take Polanco over Cutch, and I don’t think that take is as hot as most people would think it is.

Those who saw Evans expose himself said that it was no big deal.

I guess punching a producer doesn’t seem so bad now, does it?

Objectively speaking, no, they aren't.

You’re one of those. Awesome.

None of these guys are worth the contracts they signed. Fantastic.

With his personal experience he should give a few tips on safety.

Who’s down with JPP? Every last EMT!

It’s good to see that the England players have unified a nation that was tearing itself apart 5 hours ago by offering themselves up as a sacrifice. Superb.

This. He totally comes across as a fan who just happens to know more about the sport than 99% of the world. I’m digging Gordon in his new role.

Almost voted Browns here, but Cleveland’s won enough this week.

So what? For one night I was my ex-girlfriend’s best hook-up, but I don’t see any Deadspin posts about that.

No. He’d have a better chance than Guzan, but that’s like saying that slightly larger snowball will be totally fine in hell compared to that small one. No one is saving that screamer in the top corner.

You’re fucking dumb.

Draymond Green could have kicked Messi in the balls. Probably a more effective strategy.

HOT TAKE ANSWER:

Fucking Donovan.

I’ve always said, “Goals change games."