Papelbon bumped him. Should be 20 games for Papelbon.

Normally I'd say fuck Joe West. But fuck Papelbon more. Plus West was trying to walk away and Papsmear wouldn't let him.

Ha, I mean, it's just eggs and tomato sauce. If you close your eyes, you can almost pretend it's a rendition of scrambled eggs and ketchup, only not disgusting.

This is, without a doubt, the first Foodspin cooking column subject I had no idea even existed. It sounds ... exotic.

We gotta listen to Olbermann on this. No one knows more about getting fired for being a dick.

GOODELL: Hey, how bout that Redskins name controversy, I'd love to talk about that now. I say, let's change it! Who's with me??

The NFL's explanation just got JACKED! UP!

You mean the same league that deliberately lied about the long-term effects of concussions lied about a video?!?!?

"I didn't technically see it...."
-Roger Goodell, after poking both eyes out with a hot andiron

They must be using a lousy microphone, because I'm watching these videos and all I can hear is a rhythmic slapping sound.

+1 accomplice

Don't be an asshole. He was just highlighting the differences in the situations. Like how the camera was able to "testify" against Rice, whereas Lewis was able to murder his witness. I mean, he's right, the situations aren't comparable.

Ray Lewis: There is no comparison of me and Ray Rice. I'm far more similar to Aaron Hernandez.

Where's the white jacket, Ray?

• Baltimore fans:

It's refreshing to see someone light themselves on fire while simultaneously carrying water.

You know the situation is seriously fucked up when it's getting me to like Adam Schefter

The handrail in the elevator has also expressed regret for its involvement.

I would like to invite anybody knocking this beautiful car over repair costs and total cost of ownership to find your nearest Toyota dealership, crawl under a 2015 Corolla, and be quiet. You're clearly missing the point here.