I’m excited, actually. If they can build a decent-quality, average-looking car that isn’t a complete bore to drive and be able to sell it for 20-30% less than the equivalent Chevy or Toyota, then they’ve just caught the attention of 99.9 percent of American car buyers. In fact, I’ve just created a plan for them.…

Eh, I like it. Much better looking than the alien-faced new F-150 and the recessed rectangles-and-lines that go nowhere look of the new Silverado. It gets the testosterone flowing, but in the “this will look nice parked in front of my off-grid wilderness cabin and complement my long, flowing beard and huge, meaty…

Well, it was designed by Peter Schreyer, so an Audi badge at least makes some sense to put on it, right? I mean, there has to be a way to rationalize this.  

That’s actually not a bad idea. Expand the gas guzzler tax to anything with 8 or more cylinders or with a 6,000 pound GVWR or more, and then use the money from that to subsidize EV sales. Buyers of EVs get to keep the tax credit, and us enthusiasts won’t mind because we buy used anyway.

Forgot: give it some long and convoluted alphanumeric name like mx325isdxae CSL Gran Coupe Turismo M-sport iPerformance sxDrive EfficientDynamics ActiveHybrid Tourer 35i

I like the plan for Lotus. Electric sports cars and a restoration program for classics are a good way to make money without alienating the fan base. Now, my idea was to turn Lotus in to the British Porsche with an entry-level sports car to compete with the Boxster/Cayman (Elise/Exige), mid-level sports car to go…

“Hmm, I should buy a Tesla”

Both of my neighbors are diehard Corvette guys. Help me.

What do you mean, I have to spec the Premium Package for dental and the Cold Weather Group for a 401(k)?

I actually like this idea. But it strays away from my “plan to make Cadillac produce good cars and be taken seriously again”, which involves this:

No, they can’t axe the CT6. What they need to do is this:

I drove from Oklahoma City to Tucson and back last September, and here’s how it went:

Not just the BMW Z4 zDrive35i GranHardtopConvertible M-Sport, it’s the BMW ActiveHybridTourer Z4 zDrive35csldxiae GranHardtopConvertible M-Sport iPerformance

Wait, the Chinese aren’t ready for artificial organ-powered, pushbutton manual gearbox-equipped, autonomous cab-over supercars for cephalopods?

But isn’t the government of the People’s Republic of Imgonnafuckingkillmyselfstan the largest purchaser of Mercedes S-Classes?

Geoff: Exclusive Diesel/Electric hybrid powertrain, dual bucket seats with Gardén-Centré designer fabric, AM/FM/Cassette stereo with twin speakers, spring-loaded safety bumper, TVR racing wheels, anti-theft system with real finger slicing action

What if this is a St. Elsewhere type situation where it’s just some autistic kid playing with his Hot Wheels and envisioning them in his mind as anthropomorphic beings with an established society, with the shout-outs to the rest of the Pixar canon only being added in to make it seem realistic and the whole thing being…

I have this great idea for a new in-car infotainment system. It’s called Radio & Directions.

Counterpoint: Military discounts suck anyways because they reel you in with sweet rebates and discounts and then get you with 120% APR over 90 years.

There is only one true answer to this question. Powerstroke Excursion.