This is so good to see. I would have killed to have parents even half as supportive. I struggled a lot with my identity growing up, and still do. My parents were, if not overtly homophobic, at least harbored a feeling of gay people as some nefarious “other” up to no good. But, at the same time, my dad DEFINITELY…

I would be far more hurt if any of my children turn out to be Republicans.

How is this moron not stuck in the Greys with me? I’ve been here for the last 9 months and never said something that stupid.

Go fuck yourself.

“I thought the criminal justice system was perfect in 99.9 percent of the situations.”

“This Is The Face Of A Man Getting Pulled . . .

*pushes that comment off of the desk

Tom, can we get a Dead Letters, failed pitches edition?

justthetips@deadspin.com

Thanks, Tom. Hope it’s okay to forward this to the Red Sox starting rotation so they can also learn to fucking pitch.

I have naked pictures and fuck vids I’ve been sitting on for a long time.

“He’s not kidding!” -Leonard Felch

I can see Eli plugging this into a graphing calculator and get confused by the “Low Battery” message. Not because of the answer, but moreso that an NFL player does not know what “battery” means.

“Trust me, you’re better off not knowing.”

Outside of leadership skills and dedication to the cause, this picture suggests other, more obvious traits are also required.

I was a pledge for two days at a frat in a university in the south. Day two they put a paper bag over my head and threw me down some stairs. I got up and hit the first person I saw as hard as I could. I wasn’t allowed to pledge anymore after that.

I do not want to see Robert Kraft given a blowjob, but I do want to live in a world where the video of Robert Kraft getting a blowjob is widely available.

“After the two girls got into a fight about cigarettes and abused an elderly lady.”

There is a word for people like you.
Hero

Brandon:
He liked to strip near-naked in the background while I was video-chatting my girlfriend.