I would love a remastered version of this article for this momentous occasion.

Can you believe we’re only four months away from the 10th anniversary of the infamous “We love the new Dawes album and here’s why you should too!” shitshow?

‘Hollyboob’ is really lazy. It would have been better if they had changed the sign to ‘BIG FUCKING TITTIES!’

Anyway, Cena was beaming in from his own version of Peacemaker’s Batcave, which looked sort of like the low-rent bachelor pad of an arrested adolescent, a vibe Cena notes is perfect, since his take on his Suicide Squad sort-of hero is that he’s “like a douchey, bro-ey Captain America.”

“HEY WHERE DO YOU WANNA EAT AFTER THIS!!!!!?????”

Ted Danson will show up but in a twist he will be playing Becker 

That is the essence of what Sam Barsanti has to flesh out the tiny blurbs of news he builds into an article. Axios’s tiny ass, 2 min read articles always leave something to be desired, but even their articles have more substance than something like above.

You’re right to the sentiment that there’s plenty of quality writers on the AV Club that don’t deserve the shit thrown at them. Sam Barsanti certainly isn’t one of those writers.

Unfortunately, Sam Barsanti doesn’t read the comments on his awful articles, so he’ll happily do this again.

Again, you’ve selectively misread the original article to put your own stupid spin on a celebrity. You write shit like “her phone also works and that she’d be willing to talk” as if she’s sitting at home in her loneliness desperately trying to bring back a character from a movie she made 30 years ago.

That's a great movie and Cloris owns the screen for the few minutes she's in it. Good puck.

Whoa.

For me, it will be the opening moments of Kiss Me Deadly.

I briefly read it as Space Jam 2: The Conjuring, and was both baffled and captivated.

Conan O’Brien did a piece on it at the time and even bought one of them.

Michael Bluth would definitely say he ran into Jerk Ron Howard.

Conan bought the Tom Cruise and Fonzie figures during his Tonight Show and used them in a bunch of bits, ending with them being shot out of a cannon:

Anya is one of my top favorite Buffy characters, so when I saw Dottie in WandaVision, I didn’t even realize it was Caufield Ford.

While poor Rodney Dangerfaux looks like he’s in the middle of amyocardial infarction, the real Dangerfield actually did wear suits that fit this badly.