What the fuck is wrong with this guy?

Cricket’s cool, but they wear wide-brimmed sun hats and stop for tea, so let’s call it even?

Almost every Medal of Honor citation starts with “Disobeying orders he went into battle...”

Having just purchased a mattress after weeks of research, I learned that side-sleeping and firm mattresses are not a good match.

Having just purchased a mattress after weeks of research, I learned that side-sleeping and firm mattresses are not a…

Because the white letters don’t have road grime forcefully ground into them, thousands of times per minute.

I don’t think you actually know what a straw man is.

Don’t be disingenuous, Bobby.

I’ve never actually heard somebody call for “more think pieces.” I’m afraid of you.

I think you misunderstand the point of “#notallmen.”

Haha, thanks.

Dismissive wanking is the only appropriate response to your misguided, condescending, moralizing.

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“Shocking as it may be, that would probably make a lot of people happy.”

Exactly. The joke is that people really hate the fucking Cowboys.

If you’re not from Brazil, it’s hard to understand the magnitude of this tragedy.

Okay. But it sounds like they realize that script was PROBLEMATIC and changed it. So, what’s the problem?

Exactly. It’s like Michelle Obama says, “When they go low, we go low.”

Looks like the poor kid thinks his team’s 3-pointer put them up by 3.

My guess is that if you’re the type of person who can pull this off, you’re already pretty confident and charismatic.