He should quit worrying about money and do his job for the same reason I do mine - the love of repeated head trauma.

We're just so jaded to political corruption now. This should be a career-ending scandal. Take six digits of dollars in bribes, then circumvent the democratic process with absolutely baldfaced chicanery. But there'll be no repercussions whatsoever. None.

Love to hear Chicago feeling sorry for itself as if they didn't just resign the WNBA's 2014 Sixth Woman of the Year Allie Quigley to the defending Eastern Conference champions, the Chicago Sky. For multiple years no less! Spoiled much?

As a former resident of Chicago, I can say that most of them aren't getting out of bed today because it's a Wednesday in February. When you've not seen the sun since mid-November, your will to live dies.

To be fair, I think a dog has every right to root against Michael Vick.

What a moron. He'll delete the tweet where he acts like a sexist pig but not the one where he rips off the Stones.

Iman Shumpert going for the whole "use a name of someone more famous than me" technique.

Lawrence Taylor: How old are you?

Guys don't dump friends, they just fade away. That way, who knows, down the road your interests might converge and you're friends again. It's a very elastic concept.

"When he loosened his grip slightly, I said, 'Just do it. Kill me.'"

Shocking and appalling. Western Michigan Football has message boards and boosters?

"…and what type of lion did you say it was again?"

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, sh... hey, where'd you go!?!

This is weird. Gary Lawless cares about rules and you actually have to pay for the Winnipeg Free Press. It's like words don't matter anymore.

Taking a page out of the Syracuse playbook, and as an act of contrition for my impure thoughts and deeds in the past, I have decided that I will not allow myself to have sex with Kate Upton in 2015.

Man what the fuck is wrong with people? The SI Swimsuit Edition isn't about normal sized people or normal anything. It's specifically about featuring exceptionally good-looking and athletic swimsuit models.

Aw, one day Blount will get a shirt with his own nickname on it. Of course it will also say Krispy Kreme.

Lynch: 24 carries, 102 yards, 1 TD, 1 catch for 31 yards (that kickstarted what should have been Seattle's game winning drive)

Hey look, it's the guy who literally walked out on his team, sucker punched a guy after a game and has bounced around the league because he's a total dope. Blount is the precise definition of a bitch.

My daughter died in 2011 when she was five from a malignant brain tumor.