Police reported he was in a state of dystopia after leaving the Huxley nightclub, Rave New World.

It's pretty cool that he bought a car referencing his contributions to the team.

To be fair, I'm sure pot brownies have some nutritional value.

The lakefront bike path is a hostility petri dish. All summer it is clogged with wandering fatties, mommy's with baby carriages and the greatest scourge of all ROLLER BLADERS (FUCK ROLLERBLADERS, IF YOU HAVE TO USE THE ENTIRE LANE THAN FUCK YOU). It would not be so bad except there are alternative paths all over the…

The space between the door and the frame is vertical. If she turned the camera, you wouldn't see any more of the wolfdog.

That's actually not a bad idea, since I find myself distracted by the action on the Wii-U pad in New Super Mario and NES Remix. Like, my brain KNOWS that the action is on the TV but it wants to LOOK AT THE PAD!

"He can't talk, but he was just smiling a lot and he was just fist pumping. They said as soon as we saw you jump, his face just lit up and he was just fist pumping and stuff so that made it so worth it for me," Torres said.

No conspicuous ball skills, surprisingly fast while running in a straight line, a propensity to celebrate in a meaningless game, and no regard for authority.

Have lurked here for years. Had to sign up just to say I got out of bed. Sat down on the toilet. Opened my RSS feed and was like .. Damn they got me.

I have a way to prevent injury to players, but still keep the fans entertained. Each touchdown would still be worth 6, and to get the extra point the kicker and Goodell would meet at the 50 yard line where the kicker would then kick Goodell squarely in the balls. If he falls the team gets 1 point, if he remains on his…

I'm the same way with jersey ads/ads on the field. Cut commercial breaks in half, I'm game.

Whoever had a Honda and never opened the trunk instead of the gas cap or vice versa deserves praise, respect and admiration

A Jalopnik writer just called the current weather terrible.

Looks like my state got it right for once!

"which is designed to be trivial"

Man, Fuck Lamar Odom. There are enough drug addicts in the world that have been dealt a shitty hand in life to feel sorry for. He's always been a lazy, cocky, arrogant, dick and while I don't wish this on anyone, my level of sympathy is pretty low.

You got the wrong Hummer. The H2 is an affront to humanity. The H1 at least had good off-road capabilities. Give me the original HMMWV any day, though. That or a bobbed deuce and a half.

In the early 'aughts I was a graduate instructor teaching writing at a big D-I basketball school with insanely successful programs, both men's and women's (you might be able to guess which).

His ass also immediately took to Twitter to apologize:

My PC, and a PS4 talk on Skype: