Shit, I’d need more firepower than that to feel safe at a strip club on the outskirts of Detroit.

+1

Vin Scully is a national treasure and I really hope he decides to accept the offer(s) to call the All-Star Game or a World Series game or inning or something in his last season, but him rambling tediously about random bullshit is not good and if someone else did it we would mock them a lot probably.

Hurry up and get home so I can impose my dictatorial will upon you until I go to bed. Hope you’re ready for some Paw Patrol, motherfucker.

Hard to imagine any of the principals in this story thought that getting Doug Mirabelli to the game in time for Wakefield’s first pitch was actually worth the miraculous effort it took — but rather thought it was just a fun way to test/flex their ability to do it.

It was a weird trade and Gordon has skills that are generally overrated (hitting for average while never walking, stealing a lot of bases but getting thrown out a lot too) but you’re still probably right w/ Heaney turning out to not be good.

Just sleep for four to five hours like your father, wake up tired and miserable, load up on coffee and get your ass to work. No one cares.

Turns out Bonilla hasn’t left the house, has been eating home-grown food for two decades in fear of this.

Right. If teams made a habit of releasing players like Gordon, it would actually behoove good young players to take illegal PEDs to hit the open market.

(His point was that what Dee Gordon took is only forbidden by MLB professional sports’ arcane and arbitrary rules regarding so-called PEDs)

Olney’s argument can be rendered invalid before even diving into the merits (there are few/none) when you consider that even if the Marlins could void Gordon’s contract over this, they wouldn’t. Gordon would command a great deal more than his extension if he were a free agent.

Schilling’s fatal flaw is one shared by many on the right. Because Republicans vs. Democrats is covered like a professional sport, and because both parties are closely linked with the concepts of conservatism vs. liberalism, it all runs together for people like Schilling. When faced with information contrary to his…