I paid the ticket taker guy $20 to let me walk around the turnstile to see a sold out Madonna show in 1985. Yet I don’t feel the need to make a YouTube video about it. That sweet scam is gonna come in handy one of these days, I just know it.

I imagine that should you acquire some feck, you’ll be quite whelmed by the experience.

Say what you will about the politics of Manny Pacquiao, at least his balls are clean.

My bad, my bad. I should’ve said adult male chicken. Tottenham Adult Male Chickens.

A hotspur is a chicken. A chicken.

It’s hard to find specific information with my shit google skills, but I believe players can terminate their contracts with two weeks notice after not being paid for a month. Neil Lennon is quoted to this effect back in 2015 when a similar situation occurred.

What if they went the more cultured route and called it

Zlatan saying he is bigger than Jesus is 100% legit though.

Not everyone eats a balanced breakfast.

He was also 16 when he set the record. He’s trying to be the Benjamin Button of golf, maybe. I don’t know. I never saw the movie.

I got assigned to guard the haunted mine

Now I feel bad.

Doctors lie about what’s healthy for you? Talk about paranoid. I call bullshit.

14 hours? You driving a go-kart, or just trying to avoid killing deer?

Be a man! Turn your back to the mirror, hold another mirror up, and buzz your neck yourself.

This is a treasure trove of “OMG, people ate that?”

This is a terrible take. Jimmy Fallon is a fantastic entertainer and one of our most gifted actors. Can you even imagine Band of Brothers without Fallon? Without him it would’ve been just another hack job full of mediocre actors who never amounted to anything.

Ali walking with his head up is such a simple thing, yet a lovely act of defiance.

+1 for giddy up