BBC used to let you choose between TV announcers, radio announcers and stadium sound for cricket matches.

Kudos to whoever edited out the other 8000 plus words.

It sometimes feels as though this column is uniquely devoted to making fun of Baseball for having unwritten rules combined with a frank and honest discussion about the unwritten rules of air travel and using the shitter.

Let me see if I follow this argument:

“I don’t particularly care for soccer, time to vote for a racist demagogue as President!”

He doesn’t even deserve the happiness that mariachis bring. He needs to get tuba’d everywhere from now on.

This should be his life forever:

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

“The shitters are getting bolder” is a phrase I never thought would pass through my mind, yet here we are.

You went to K State. A lot more than 5 minutes has been stolen from you.

I remember when I was so thrilled to get that new issue of SI, and I’d flip right to the back page to read Reilly.

Can you please keep your narratives straight? Ben didn’t suddenly say this after the draft. His tune changed the day Todd Haley, the offensive coordinator he was constantly rumored to be feuding with, was replaced by quarterbacks coach Randy Fichtner.

Like, who outside of Columbus and Philly didn’t want to see the Capitals and Penguins go at it again in the second round this year?

My team’s the Leafs, so I don’t really have all the usual reasons to like one over the other, or hate both (like, geographical reasons & whatnot). But I wouldn’t say I’m an Ovi FAN, really. Sid, on the other hand, is my favourite player, & I can get pretty obnoxious with the goat emojis.

I’m sure Darnold will make a fine Jet. After all, the bar for USC QBs is so low in New York, if you jump over it, you hit a lineman in the ass and fumble.

Kudos for spending the night before bailing. “I regret that I have but one nut to bust for my country.”

Watching Crosby completely outclassing Giroux on the faceoff was fantastic.

Real yinzers go to the O, dodge the used needles, and get their fries with a side order of “more fries than you should eat in a year.”

I have to say that Pittsburgh was the best goddamn NFL experience I’ve had in this country.
God bless that city and its bars of cheap beer, stodgy delicious food and people who were so friendly that I thought I was being conned.
I love that goddamn place.

This is the worst take and you should be ashamed.