Milkshake machines..!!

Your headline has brought me great joy.

Dear Mark, You are cordially invited to visit the currently frozen tundra that is PA. You wouldn't have to brave the bullshit amount of snow that Boston's got, but you could impress your friends with talk of -25 (fahrenheit!!) wind chills and great suffering. Please do consider it. I'll go all out and provide the…

Oh, Kelly. My eyes! What have I ever done to you? I'm a faithful reader, I laugh at your jokes, and THIS is the thanks I get. *whimper* I'll be in my room, pouring bleach on my mind's eye.

Do NASCAR drivers get concussions too?

Because of you, tea came dangerously close to being snarfed out of my nose. Thank you for that. (;

A New Zealander friend of mine turned me on to Tim in 2010.. Prejudice was the first song I heard and I was hooked from the beginning! White Wine in the Sun is my favorite Christmas song ever, and I had the pleasure of seeing a small show Tim did in NYC in 2011. It was such a great show and I got to meet and speak to…

I love Tim Minchin with a love that is strong and true..! And you are obviously cool for having heard of him.

I missed Jezebel's timely reporting last summer and I did not preorder it. And in the words of the immortal Veruca Salt, I want it NOW. However I suppose this is just the kind of consequence I deserve for not reading every single Jezebel article every single day. I might have to soothe the pain by reading the full…

Central PA.. it's all about the pork and sauerkraut. I'm not positive I'll have bad luck all year if I don't eat it, but I'm not willing to take the risk. *full disclosure: eating sauerkraut has seemed to bring me fuckall good luck, year after year. Ever the optimist, I am.