I just watched the Brad Pitt eppy of Friends, and he was so smoking hot back then, I was really happy for Jennifer Aniston. She got him when he was prime Hollywood meat. 

Makes total sense that he’s a Sagittarius.

That Kumail picture makes me even more convinced that he dehydrated for a few hours before taking the selfie the other day. He still looks jacked here, but he doesn’t have that really defined muscle tone from the photo.

I mean...violence is not the answer, but I understand. I don’t condone it, but I get it.

sexual contact with human remains without authority

Agreed, a WandaVision movie would never get made but damn it we’re getting a TV show which is awesome. Honestly, Feige since he’s been creative boss has been nearly flawless. You cannot say the same thing about Marvel Television.

“How could I have known I would actually, you know, be held accountable for my actions? I’m a straight white man, dammit!!”

Dammit, you chucklefuck, your intentions were perfectly clear. You wanted to hurt and embarrass a total stranger because some stray gross impulse darted across your lizard brain and being a white male, you never even thought to resist or question it. You honestly expected her to find that funny or at least “laugh it…

The fact that he lawyered up instead of just apologizing really says a lot.

Additionally, in a statement to CBS News, Callaway’s lawyer stated that he, “did not act with any criminal intentions” and that “Tommy is a loving husband and father.” Of course, how much he loves his wife and children is irrelevant to Callaway’s inability to keep his hands to himself. And besides, Bozarjian isn’t…

Topping the list of things I will not be buying secondhand? Sex Bench.

I feel like it’s one of those things where it’s so tied to your previous partner that you don’t want to keep it and be reminded of them.  So... does it go on Craig’s list or to Goodwill?

Fuck Nick Cannon and his pseudo-macho alpha male bullshit. 

I think Joan was using May-December romance literally, as in the calendar length of their relationship. Although it appears to be May 2018 - December 2019, so even that usage is pretty misleading.

I know this is directed at Jason Derulo, but really the world would be a much better place if all guys took this advice to heart.

No one cares about your boner

Eww, phrasing !

That’s what we call Norwegian-American lingerie. You betcha! Uff da! 

I did too!

Hey, I don’t usually point out mistakes in articles here, but you have the wrong link for Jared Kushner’s voice. I got the right one for you, though.