Dr. Robert Anderson:

you are a bad, bad person:)

You know they make these things called lasers, would take that tattoo right out.

This. Thank god my rebellious choices at that age were confined to smoking pot, wearing way to much eyeliner, and (mis)quoting Nietzsche at my mother when asked to go to church. Also hooking up in secret with one of my friends 21 year-old brother because he was super mature and like got me on a level no one else did…

well, teenagers tend to think they are smart and make great decisions.

Just came off of a month on Grand Jury. It made me seriously question whether reasonable, adult humans exist. I remember thinking if this is a jury of my peers, then we are FUCKED.

What do you do if your hosting and a friend is bringing an insufferable militant vegan?

Look at Woodstock. That Fuckin’ cannibal. He was a bird too, Woodstock! You could be next year’s feast. Show some goddamned respect!

This is how it's done. And Ralph? STFU - you are no longer relevant. YOUR former bid for attention put us smack dab IN this mess.

Nader can fuck right off. Part of the reason we got Bush in the White House was because of his dick waggling.

The colloquial name for that is “The Chuck Berry”.

dont forget seduced and schemed. oh, what Robert Graves did to Livia. one of the most important political figures of the Roman Empire, reduced to a crude plot device.

a trope as old as writing; blame the woman

“My boyfriend sucks at football”

“My girlfriend’s not funny”

The call came from inside the locker room!

Well Dan, you’ve played for the All Blacks, how would you like to come play for the All Whites?

I suppose they will have a flood of visitors for the first forty days and forty nights. Then it will kind of dry up.