No, pwease expwain it using smawwer words.

Can't she be a bigoted POS who definitely would not have stood for this?

My wedding was more like a picture session/family dinner/hiking vacation, so I had really (cheap) simple cotton lace dress, and sprung for these shoes because I am the shortest and dream of being tall.

But really, why was she standing so close to those bushes, anyway?

I just have to comment again, because:

CAN'T SEE WHY YOUR MOM DIDN'T WANT YOU TO MEET WITH HIM.

Reading the actual piece, I'm wrong about the age-15 part, no actual contact then, but everything else is still super creepy, so I apologize for nothing.

Yup, if any 30-year old man started talking to a girl when she was 15, and then slept with her at 17, and married her at 18, I'd call it grooming.

Dear everybody (apparently),

But I shower every couple days, and my white husband showers 1-2 time a day, so, what I'm saying is that Naya Rivera was totally 100% right, based on an undeniably significant sample size.

This is obviously ridiculous, but I see a lot of people who think the sperm donor should have "some say" in the choice of abortion, and I'm like, that doesn't exist. There's this, and there's no say. You can't have part of an abortion. If you think a man should have "some say" over whether his fetus is aborted, you…

I mean, only in that it would be hard to go to the bathroom or get your pants off all. So, you know, if you're wearing pants that are covered in piss and shit, you might be a little less likely to get laid.

Does that also mean that China's prosperity is also no coincidence? I guess God is tired of the US and is really into China right now.

It will make you shit your brains out.

I did! That's exactly the email I got! You must be psychic.

Another alum here. I also sent a strongly worded email.

He once taught at MSU. But still, I think the former MSU professor who was only hired because he was the women's basketball coach's husband and bit a cop in an airport would be a better choice.

Well, the other fall commencement speaker this year is Michael Moore. Who is, at the very least, a Michigan institution.

MSU has had LOTS of high-profile conservative commencement speaker, but they were mostly McPherson's Reagan-administration BFFs.

Do you really get to decide whether your own heart is in the right place? I mean usually it's said by other people. I mean, maybe because it's just acknowledging that the non-heart parts of you were in the wrong place.