This. A thousand times this. Would love to have won last year, but this is the one that I really wish we had won.

Mets beat the Yankees in the 2000 World Series. Not even close.

In a statistical oddity, his WAR has been 2.0 every season for the last 70 years.

Look at its shadow. And compare it to the dude’s shadow in the video. Also, where is the camera angle from said dude?

Show of hands, who read that as eats his own shit at a first glance?

I’d rather be shot out of a cannon into a brick wall than see the Penguins win a face-off, let alone score a goal, let alone win a game, or God almighty forbid they win the Stanley Cup. Go Sharks.

Hang on, hang on, hang on... Wait...

Oh, so when La Russa squeezes into a booth unannounced, he’s “defending the truth.” But when I do it, I’m “drunk” and “not welcome in this IHOP anymore.”

Billy Joel used to do something similar to people’s living rooms until he got his license revoked.

NCAA Once Again Bans Fun.

Good, that band sucked.

Listen, I’m as anti-NCAA as any typical Deadspin lunatic, but you need to respect some basic tenants of decency. In no canonical universe would Tony Stark use that old ass phone.

Hey. Fuck you. ~A fellow New Yorker.

Braves: We need a new stadium!

Barry I was there and it was bad. And it makes me sick. This guy — almost single-handedly — starts to turn this franchise around in 2013, pitches the team into the god-damned World Series in 2015, and is getting booed off of the mound for a rough start to his 2016.

If it was the regular season, they might call a machete to the groin, but they let that kind of stuff go in the playoffs.

A chicken bone walks into Aybar.

You have won today’s internet. Now please go find your smile.

Which is a more terrifying sign of our coming dystopian future: President Trump? Or Phil Kessel Stanley Cup Champion?

Sorry, I’m a millenial- who’s Billy Nays?

This is a reasonable and correct take and has no place in Kinja.