I get that you’re making fun of white guys. But I’m guessing Ilyasova and Saric have seen more gun battles that any “gangstas” on their team.

Yes, lying down and dying was sad and embarrassing and not what the Raps’ vociferous fanbase deserved.

Old enough to gamble? Shit, man, I was in high school when he started playing and I’m old enough to run for the Senate.

Lol you must be new to deadspin if you think they fawn over the sixers.

the strangeness of nfl access journo, and the fact remains, someone has to do it, and most would do it in a more evil way that Peter King.

Secconndedd

I demand that Emma’s replacement also has at least three sets of double consonants in his/her full name.

All sports owners are terrible, including the ones that own the teams I cheer for. Lacob is more terrible than a replacement-level owner, but he’s not superstar levels of terrible.

It’s rumored Maria’s writing her character to be the ante hero.

I assume the non-door-holder and the Tabasco stealing psycho are the same person.

I get that swans are majestic and beautiful and blah, blah, blah...but they are also almost as big of an asshole as geese, which are notorious for being the biggest jerks in the animal kingdom. I’m not saying that I support kicking swans in the head for karate practice, but I am saying that I bet those swans have done…

Most restaurants refill their condiment bottles from a big old sack of condiment refiller to cut down on the cost of buying bottles.

The latter is worse. People can deal with you taking 30 seconds to pour a condiment. Taking one of the restaurant’s bottles is literally just stealing, just as it would be to take a metal fork or something.

Also, where are you eating these? If you’re taking your to-go burrito back to either your home or office, just…

Guarantee the guys cell phone is way dirtier than those towels.

There was also one bit in there that the idiot letter-writer is failing to recognize: By his own admission, his fiancee has already been incredibly understanding and accommodating of his request not to spend time around this friend, but it is not nearly enough for him. Instead he sees it his born right as a dudebro to…

Fuck you, John!

Your answer to the guy with the vaguely annoying friend-of-fiencee was the best answer, Albert. It was the very, very best answer. It was a real-life answer, the answer of a wise real-life man. It should be read by all members of all marriages, because there’s something in it for everyone.

Thank you for that answer.

John is a psycho.

Amy Winehouse? Seriously?

Hmm, what are the odds he’d bump into the volleyball team and she’d spike his chances? Maybe it was set up.