It’s so luxurious, you wouldn’t believe what people are saying about this stocking cap, I sent the best people to find my cap, they tell me this is the longest one anywhere, anywhere in the world you can’t find a better one than this, I was in China and other Asia and I see the stocking caps they have there, everyone…

I jerked off. A lot. I mean, I still do, but I don’t have roommates.

Fucking liberals. Telling people to register to vote. Bunch of fucking cucks.

Bob Lamey is also RGIII’s new nickname.

I don’t care about that! The reason to tell the truth is not that it might accomplish some strategic political goal like defeating a particular candidate. The reason to tell the truth is that it is the truth.

I’d imagine Bill has been in a fight or two given he fucks everything that moves. It’s hard to stay out of fights when that is your hobby.

The Netherlands seem nice! (I would stay because I’m lazy and it’s tough to fly with a cat.)

A man who was paid handsomely without producing anything of value has nothing left to learn in Silicon Valley.

Again, if you take Univision’s statements at face value, this was not an editorial decision, which will be underscored by the fact that this post won’t be deleted, as it cannot be construed as a liability carrying over to the new ownership group! But I know law is hard.

I got so high with these nice people who picked me up while I was hitchhiking one time, and they played me some Phish, and I was like, “I feel the music ...”

Cut Joyce a break. This is, like, his first mistake out there.

Hildabeast Clinton and the Vagenda of Manocide is probably my least favourite JK Rowling book.

I don't feel like cunt is a strong enough word.

there should be an event where terrified, unskilled people try to build up the courage to jump off high boards for 30 minutes and then do a flailing pencil dive and come up coughing and gasping

colloquialism

We’re all accountable, BarfRocket.

The auction winner.

There is a Beyoncé take, which is shared (with varying degrees of sincerity) by at least three people on staff, that no one will ever publish for fear of the Beyhive’s wrath. Seriously. They are worse than Gamergate.