In some areas of Massachusetts, the accents are thicker than the ones you find in Boston Proper. The thickest accents I've heard are north shore.

Big E Festival ftw!

And in Maine, no fucks were given. Everybody I've met from Maine is pretty proud of being from there. It's a beautiful state. I can't say I blame them.

Moms have mastered the art of perpetually embarrassing their children.

No one man should have all that power.

I carry pepper spray on my keychain everywhere I go. I live in a multi-family house right next to a river, in the back on the ground floor. Sometimes the other tenants forget to leave a spotlight on, which sucks. Pepper spray makes you feel a little safer.

I never want to be one of those people who write lengthy diatribes about politics and society. Please put me out of my misery if I ever become one of those insufferable FB users.

Some guys are too drunk to know that they're never cumming.

Crying Through Botox is the name of my new indie rock band.

My mom owns a cake shop, and people are going ape shit for Frozen-themed cakes. My dumbass came into work and I asked "Why are you doing a snowman cake in April?"

Keep them coming, please.

My mom owns a custom cake shop. Trust me, I feel your pain. Everybody wants a three-tier birthday cake, but nobody wants to pay the price. Hi, it's three fucking cakes. You're basically ordering a wedding cake. I manage her inbox, so I deal with these morons all the time. I also love when customers say it's a "simple…

I had foie gras for the first time at Les Halles in NYC. My date wanted me to try it, because he loved it. I took one bite and thought I was going to gag. It tasted like the FAT you find on steaks and other meat. Blech!

Eww forever.

I'm taking a wild guess.

Well, if she does have MS, then she was just asking for it then. Because MS turns you into a giant slut who is just asking to be sexually violated by strangers. If she has MS, she deserved it!

Oh wow, how shocking! A group of white men in positions of authority being total pricks to women who have been victimized. That never happens! All sarcasm aside, what the fuck is wrong with society and the way we treat rape victims? This is fucking 2014, not 1955. Why can't men get it through their dense, dumb skulls…

It just proves the theory that mediocrity sells. The people who are actually edgy and cool think Richardson's work is absolute shit. If you want provocative and eye-catching, check out Clayton Cubitt or Bruno Dayan. Fuck Terry. He brings nothing to the table but molestation.

I don't agree: Big butts became a thing when J. Lo became popular.