There’s a place on my way home where there are two lanes, then one becomes a right turn only lane and only the left lane goes forward.  The left lane will get backed way up sometimes and then buttholes will come along and try to pass a bunch of those people and squeeze in. It happens a lot where I get on the…

Or you pass a long row of cars in line and try to get in line.  I’ll close the gap.

The rubber bands in the Rogue make it feel slower than it is.  Plus if you do try to accelerate the engine just gets buzzier and it eventually gets power to the wheels.

I got married there (in Toronto) before it was legal in my state.

DO IT!

EXACTLY!! That’s just adding weight.

It’s a church/prison van rather than “Free Candy” kidnapper van... nothing creepy about that.

there’s a built-in CRT television, so your kid can appreciate what life was like before LCDs!

Ozzy Man is funny as shit!

He’ll need to sew tweed patches on the elbows of his jacket, but this is a solid suggestion.

He would also prefer something that is not a pickup truck.

1. In this car, don’t.

To be fair, I did a practice near-panic-stop when I test drove my truck, but it was a red light with no one behind me and no actual cross-traffic anyway, and I had space between me and the line. And the salesperson wasn’t pressuring me.

BURN THE WI...

WEIGHT REDUCTION BRO!

Exactly.  Why not ram it into a wall to see if the airbags work?

If he had to stop to have a fist fight with a kangaroo.

I see what you did there...

Everyone knows the real International color is red:

I would have thought Marie Kondo (for the space utilization fetish) and a space alien interested in old transportation modes.