beautyinthefeast
beautyinthefeast
beautyinthefeast

I consider myself a somewhat lucky person, but my 19th birthday was, seriously, the luckiest day of my life.

My girlfriend and I live in Lake Tahoe. Like a lot of people who live in beautiful places, we pay a fucking premium to rent abject shitholes, which are also drafty. In January of last year, during a snowstorm, my landlord informs me that she'll be 'renovating' my shithole of a place and that I have 29 days to get out

A friend had broken up with her boyfriend and was totally convinced she was going to meet The One at some lame party happening at a lame club in one of the lame casinos on the edge of town. She wanted me to go as her wingman, and since I was trying to be a supportive friend, I ditched my husband to go with her.

You need to mind your own pants parts!

Jesus H, you people are TERRIBLE at sarcasm.

"Honey, how do you expect me to get in the mood if you don't even have colored drop-down selections for column B?"

If this lackluster Excelmanship is any indication, this is a man who lacks passion.

Why do you impose your ideas concerning why women do it when you honestly don't know what's in the head of the women in question?

Because I have zero maturity, there is no way I can imagine NOT drawing a ludicrous face on that beautiful blank canvas.

Plus he is the only character more annoying that Piper on OITNB.

I think you should have written this out in reverse order. Start with the lowest rated task and build up to number one.

They should have never stopped airing Xena.

Comcast's new album, Ryan, drops next week.

This is the worst breakup I've ever had the misfortune of having to witness.