Right. Because I am a terrible parent whose response above was meant to be taken literally. Thanks for the tip.

These stories are so dissimilar in intent, crime and characters that your statement essentially makes no sense.

Only a matter of time before it makes it to ESPN Ocho

If I got arrested for child abuse and plead out to a misdemeanour, I would be suspended from work for 0 days, and fined $0. Because it's not my workplace's responsibility to mete out justice for my children.

Only among the bourgeois. For centuries, the highest classes and the lowest indulged in tattoos. Only the craven and socially desperate bourgeoisie had those ideals.

No, because people that support her would be like, "Payback's a bitch!" So no, there would be too many people on her side because her man already did her wrong, so why NOT have a fresh-faced White House page stick a cigar in his ass in front of her?"

A four-year-old couldn't do it. So Goodell did.

I'm willing to bet that the Child Magary is not being hounded by strangers yelling at her.

Same here.

When I saw Gone Girl, people laughed after this preview. Not a good sign.

I'm originally from the NOLA area, and it's shit like this that I point to whenever someone asks "Would you ever move back?" and I say no. It's such an amazing city, but there are so many entrenched social and political issues that I just can't imagine every being dealt with properly.

Hate to burst your bubble, but this woman was married 6 times, had a drug problem, got arrested several times for shop-lifting, became neurotic and turned to plastic surgery to preserve her looks and ended up looking disfigured. I know, I know, it's still a shame that they don't make women like that anymore.

LOL. OK, 'busy mom'. Thanks for taking the time to post on Jezebel.

Sounds like the kind of thing you hear from House Trilby:

Oh Jesus Christ. "When men were MEN." Eh? You mean when men controlled everything women did and women, unless you were a famous and wealthily independent actress, had little control over their own lives and choices and were basically at the mercy of the men in their lives? Fuck you.

Exactly. No matter what kind of money these people are pulling in, there's no way they could afford the two vehicles per cat suggested by veterinarians.

Wow, I can't believe some of the responses you're getting here. I'm sorry. I think we all know cheating is wrong and shitty, but seriously, would a good friend *leave* you because you were making a bad choice? Even a choice that friend really couldn't stand? I hope not. I've made mistakes, my friends have made…

Also, I just want to say that I'm not sure how this is more morally wrong than anything else. It's not directed at you, but everyone else commenting on this thread. Are all of these people calling out their friends and folks as scum because they refuse to date a dude who's 5'2 or just brunettes? Or because they…

When re-animating your zombie boyfriend, make sure he's into you before you unleash him to carry out your evil bidding.

Did you happen to see this gem on your way into town? It's always a crowd favorite.