Perhaps if Riley convinced his billionaire owner to sacrifice by paying the luxury tax the year before in order to keep the team together, he could have better convinced a not-billionaire that everybody there was sacrificing. Instead, they traded away assets important to James to avoid paying the repeater tax.

“You’re making the biggest mistake of my career.”- Pat Riley

Patterson and Gimlin agree!

The burrito photo looks like Bigfoot wandering around in the woods.

Not without a fight.

It’s even worse; he’s a “WHY IS THIS NEWS?!!!” truther.

A Kershaw truther. Just perfect

He should’ve brat his A game.

I always relish these pun threads.

First time on deadspin?

You misunderstand me. I’m friends with a shark bite victim so it’s cool

That’s just the wurst running I’ve ever seen.

There it is! That’s the one I was looking for!

Look, it happens. You have a fair bit of success and it makes you get a big head.

This is just like the time when I broke my hand playing Golden Tee, while drunk at a bar. I eventually recovered physically, but the mental scars remained. Can’t tell you how many times I was asked to play. But I just couldn’t.

more like 330

If Barley is 250 then Shaq is still 325.

I counted 17 unwritten rules being broken (5 Cardinal, 7 Major, 3 Minor, 2 Diminutive) during this sequence. The full measure of retaliations (especially given how notoriously difficult intra-team retaliations are) probably won’t be completed before 2019.

When I saw “Oakland” I thought what have my A’s done now? Damn, I miss the steroid era.

Was that fan not aware that of any former professional basketball player, Charles Barkley is the one who has actually thrown someone through a plate glass window, and when asked by the judge if he had any regrets, said yes, I wish I had been on a higher floor?