Them’s fightin words.

Annie’s shells & white cheddar all the goddamn way. Use half milk, half Greek yogurt, throw in a little extra cheddar, and boom. Amazing & slightly tangy.

Us too....it’s a fucking mess. OPM already takes forever for background checks, and now we have this. It’s thrown all sorts of fun wrenches into our system.

This is obviously the only acceptable response. You may proceed.

For when you need that extra fancy taste!

Your closest male relative will support you while you try to attract a husband, duh. 

Jesus that’s ridiculous. Like having gone through a major medical event like childbirth doesn’t count for paid time off because it’s considered “elective”?

Last month I was pissed when I had to cancel an important thing I waited MONTHS for because I came down with a nasty cold. I know there’s no way to verify that someone from work shared their illness with me, but there’s a good chance that’s the case considering I spend 40+ hours a week in a office with hundreds of…

We have a pretty generous combined sick leave/vacation PTO system here too, but unfortunately we still end up with plenty of jackasses coming in sick and infecting everyone else because heaven forbid they stay home and use up a potential vacation day.

I don’t foresee a future in which my husband & I could afford to have kids here in the US (not that I particularly want to bring anyone into this shitty world right now anyway). We both work middle/ lower-middle class jobs & have decent benefits for now, and we have a modest living. But there’s no way we could just…

Any topical acne treatment is really only going to work on your skin as long as you keep using it. If the Proactiv shills had told the caller their product would permanently cure their acne even after stopping, it would be obviously false. It’s not really a matter of your skin’s fucked up biology so much as it’s a…

What do you have against lavender oil? That shit smells fantastic and you can pry it from my cold, dead, delightfully floral-scented hands.

(But don’t literally fuck him cause you can totally do way better.)

Hey that's my goal too! I actually cleaned out my closet and bought new underthings last week. Small things like that are such a joy. 

Maybe that’s why the Slytherin people were always so bitchy?

It goes to the Chamber of Secrets.

^ This. I used to work at a sushi bar and we’d often get asked for crayons, or a kid’s menu, or why don’t we have more than a few highchairs, etc. The manager was awesome and his response was always basically, “This is a sushi restaurant, NOT a family restaurant. Of course we don’t have a kids menu.”

There’s a big difference between loud adult conversations and the loud high-pitched shrieks, squeals, and screams of children.

For some reason, I get the sneaking suspicion this “Sam” is not a real person.