But that’s almost ten months away!

DOLL STEEEEEEEAK

Phrasing!

He didn’t know that “Big Dumb Sex” was satire.

Die wanna wonga…








NUDD CHAA

Saw the Newswire headline, had a flash of shock. You’ve got to be kidding me, I thought.

Hey, maybe you’ll turn 40 after his term is over!

“Mountain Whiz: It Comes from Goats”

“🍞💩🍞” —The A.V. Club

Tilley hat! Made with Canadian persnicketiness!

I generally dislike Ivanka jokes, but I just imagined Trump shooting Jared outside the incomplete 666 Fifth Avenue tower in a strange echo of the Stanford White murder.

After selling out (the Good Old Party)
I’ll be greetin’ the Russkies (in the White House lobby)

Hey, their first album was pretty g—oh, you said President, not Presidents.

Misread this as “Harvey Danger.” Trump does run things up the flagpole and see who looks, but no one ever does!

And elfin good!

Even the women. Don’t…don’t ask.

“Our President’s crazy / Did you hear what he said?”

“What I said was, NOBODIES are talking about Russia! We should be talking about America!”

I first heard about the name change to P. Diddy on a late night show and thought it was a joke about the gun charge: “Did he?”

BUTTERY MALES