Someone tell Puig that the Browns are looking for a quarterback.

How many minutes do you think it’ll take him to get kicked out of the next bar? I figure four.

He was unfamiliar with the layout of the house because the owner had put on an addition unlike any other.

There was plenty of years to post what a dick he was and plenty left to do so. This week? Poor taste Deadspin. #unsubscribe.

Don't get as drunk on cheap beer as I am on my own power.

I'm dead inside,