Don’t sleep on the Inception soundtrack music in the background:

I see the picture, but I don’t get it...

I used to get phone calls from bill collectors for my ex-boyfriend who actually is dead. Once, his mother got a series of phone calls from the City of Oakland regarding a ticket he had failed to deal with when he lived there. After calmly informing her that he was, in fact, deceased, the lady making the phone calls…

This isn’t very nice but whatever.

Yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.

But then how will her hardscapes grow green & lush?!

I live on the shores of the Great Lakes and I still do my part to shame my neighbours for watering their driveways, cause that is bullshit.

Won’t somebody think of the sidewalks?!?!

This woman got caught breaking the law, and is now reporting that her citation is making her less likely to repeat the same violation. Good? I’m so confused by why she thinks she’s a victim and why this is newsworthy. STOP POURING POTABLE WATER ONTO THE MOTHERFUCKING GROUND.

SHE HAS A SIDEWALK TO WATER, SIR OR MADAM

That seems like the kind of attitude that allows them to keep getting away with it.

Jango, you have no fucking experience with CS GO and you just proved that. M4A1-S is accurate as fuck, more so than its A4 counterpart while standing, the guy sprayed with very good control while standing at POINT BLANK range. Also that guy is known as “swag”. Before he was banned for deliberately throwing a match, he…

There’s no better copy editor than the readers of Kotaku. You people are terrifyingly fst.

Meme worthy

I just left a steel mill in Ohio. I get paid a good amount to install motors. The company I work for charges even more for my time naturally. This involved a 33 ton motor, 3oookm, relatively simple job. As usual, the millwrights, electricians, and the plant managers started bitching about how I basically get paid to…

There is an old story regarding Picasso. Supposedly, a patron of the arts happened upon Picasso at some social gathering. The patron begged Picasso for any of his works, and that he’s pay anything. Picasso quickly made a sketch on a cocktail napkin, and offered it to the patron for $50,000. The patron was shocked,…

I was a car stereo installer way back when that was a thing. My favorite customer experience was when a guy came in for a deck for his daughter’s spanking new Neon or something.

I'll let you know when I get to hell.

Mark, how long would it take to interview grumpy cat 10,000 times?

I think the more relevant question is why Mark needed a statistician to multiply 5.4 minutes by 10,000 guys.