“the general consensus seems to be that it’s still too soon to be planning large gatherings”

Based on what? Asking around the office? Because you say so?

This is the kind of lazy substitute for journalism that I expect from FOX News... and Kotaku, apparently.

“Don’t go in the van, kids! All cops shoot people! Big Brother wants to harvest your DNA! Will nobody think of the children???”

Nice trick, Kotaku. I keep forgetting you’re not journalists. This could have been an article about a community outreach program, but instead, you took it as an opportunity to rant about the…

Kotaku is here to shame you for resuming your life!

“fresh infusion of boomer energy with the announcement of a new Indiana Jones game”

You know that film was made in the 80's, right?

I know you’ve said that these are “old (mostly white) stories,” but you don’t need to be ageist.

“This sketch is basically just one joke, repeated over and over.”

Same.

... although I can also see Gawker already has a lot of articles that are basically someone writing a summary of someone else’s work and putting their name on it.

I find it’s helpful to just follow the link to the original article instead of bothering with the rewrite.

It’s one thing to see someone bury the lede.…

“Video games truly are a diverse hobby enjoyed by people from all walks of life...”

... as long as we can assume you’re less competent because of your age and/or gender.

“... while I am not a dad, I am personally fine with that.”

Yeah, as long as you can speak for a group you aren’t actually a part of, you don’t see a…

“I still raise money for Amazon 363 days of the year, but I’m sure my two day protest will change things.”

Streamers harvest money for Amazon by working for cheers and subs. The ethical way to protest Amazon’s working conditions would be to stop broadcasting on Twitch altogether.

“Since the story is choice-driven, we never force players in romantic situations they might not be comfortable with,” Dumont says. “Now get on your back, woman, because we’re going to make a baby.”

I think I’ll skip this DLC. 

“Less “woo-woo nonsense” and more Japanese-style animism that comes out of the country’s indigenous Shinto beliefs. This is why Kondo asks people to thank each item before discarding. In Japan, objects can have souls (which is why I once had a Shinto priest bless my phone!)“

That’s still woo-woo nonsense.

“It’s best not to think of The Black Armory as a new DLC in the traditional sense. Rather, it’s a collection of new reasons to keep grinding your way through Vanguard strikes and Gambit matches.”

So... as long as you don’t think too hard about paying money to get additional content... which is how you’d normally define…

“Price, a narrative designer of 10 years...”

This statement is not true. Please fact-check your articles.  

It’s PvP. There is no chivalry. If I see you, I will kill you with whatever I have.

“As Brown points out that he doesn’t see anything wrong with parking across two lanes...”

Other websites are reporting that he parked across two *handicapped* spaces.

I’m not saying that’s a reason to get tackled and tased, but if it’s true... wow, what a douchebag.

Even if the parking lot was mostly empty, it’s still a…

Thanks for your false dichotomy.

By your logic, if a game has one ridiculous thing, it can have any number of ridiculous things. If it’s not 100% accurate (in maps and uniforms etc. etc.), it has no obligation to accuracy, especially if it’s been adapted to the medium of a video game.

A person should be able to…

People still play World of Warcraft???

“... which sounds like a pretty awesome way to troll that solo player in their sloop.” 

Yeah, that’s... *awesome.* You’ve found a way to make any remaining solo players even more miserable.

If Fortnite Battle Royale is going to have a Thanos event, I hope that means Fortnite: Save the World will be half off.

(That would be because of the Infinity Gauntlet, of course: it’s a five-finger discount.)

Please, please, please, Marvel: Make half the cast of this show disappear.

Wait, I’ve got a better idea. Make them all disappear.

Dude, let it go.

Geguri seems willing to avoid the drama and focus on the game. You should, too.