My problem with these books, and “badass” girl culture in general, is that it still puts the onus on women and girls to beat society at its own game, instead of on society (i.e. men and boys) to change.

Right? And the few clothes they do wear are usually tacky and wacky. I just can’t empathize with her struggle lol

“How big could the market be for pasty young women with wacky sartorial tastes and wiry limbs?”

 I’m so fucking sick of being told to be careful, as though I don’t know that I need to be. That message sank in a long time ago, I don’t need to be told again. Here’s a list of the things I do out of ‘carefulness’:

I also immediately thought of Meagher, I was living in Ireland at the time and it was very big news over there. Her husband moved back to Ireland and has done amazing and good work around violence against women issues.

Sorry yes, he was out on parole, not bail - for multiple cases of rape!!! Just unbelievable...

The night she was murdered, I was at a work function about 50m from where she taken. I still get a punch in the heart when I read about her.

I think a lot of people are getting flashbacks. I don’t know if I’ve become desensitized somewhat or just feel a false sense of confidence because the place I live in now is a closer, more well-lit walk home from PT, but I’m not nearly as fearful and shaken as I was when Jill died. Maybe also because Jill was missing…

I’m getting flashbacks to the Jill Meagher incident in 2012. Because being raped and murdered and dumped in a shallow grave was totally her fault for getting drunk and walking home alone along a busy, well lit main road at an hour when trams were still running, and not the fault of a serial rapist who should have been…

I remember reading Solnit’s book, Men Explain Things to Me, and being blown away by one part in particular, a true story. I don’t remember it perfectly , but it went something like this.

I am ALWAYS aware. Most women are. We have had to deal with this shit are entire lives.

Looking forward to all the men flooding the comments with ‘well, she just should have’ ‘well, why didn’t she just’ ‘well, be more aware ladies!’

Especially if you are a lady keep you eyes open and obey the laws of stupid::

Dear Brodka,

Here’s a fun fact: Women are told our whole fucking lives to be aware of our surroundings. And we are. Because men do untold amounts of violence and harm to us. I could start talking about the violence I’ve experienced all along the spectrum and still be talking 24 hours from now. We are aware. You telling us to be…

THAT’S WHY IT’S CONDESCENDING. We already know we need to be hypervigilant in every possible situation because men act like wild fucking animals. To continue repeating it is unhelpful, condescending, clueless, and irritating. So if you really care about women, stop it. If you care more about ignoring what we’re…

It’s darling that you think this comment somehow makes things better.

The point is that WE KNOW. WE KNOW ALREADY. We are aware. We are much smaller than you and men have proven themselves to be dangerous in a myriad of situations, so WE KNOW. The advice is irritating because WE KNOW and have known our entire lives while men keep insisting on repeating it like we don’t know. WE KNOW…

She literally performed standup about violence against women, so I’m sure she “lived in the real world” and was aware of the dangers. If she had taken an Uber instead of walking and been assaulted by the driver instead, are you still going to say that? I’m willing to wager ALL women are aware of the risk of harm…

I’m sure this woman was very much aware that bad actors exist. I don’t think you’re purposely being patronizing, but that’s how it often comes off when people say things like that, which is why everyone is tired of that shit. Women are raped/murdered almost everyday in broad daylight too. I just really don’t see the…