Most impressive in the last clip is the son drinking a soda the size of his torso.

There are six, seven players in front of me at my position [in terms of money] that I honestly wouldn't let hold my right hand, and I don't even have one.

If the perpetrators of this crime are ever apprehended, lawyers for the Garden Gnome Liberation Front would like a word.

Kovy's return to the free agent market will give the Leafs one more opportunity this off-season to pass on a legitimate star and sign a third liner with grit.

His ability to separate "a lot" into two words disqualifies him from this competition.

Her legendary turnaround time at the Bangkok Palace Sensual Massage also earned her the nickname Charlie Hustle.

I suppose spending that much time on turf can really take a toll on one's jaw muscles.

I am also launching a very thorough investigation of wrestling and trying to figure out how they never thought of incorporating a Burger King baby chair into any of their matches.

This is not the first time the Navy has had to deal with one of their Cole's pictured with a gaping hole.

I thought the whole point of Indian giving was taking them back.

The most shocking thing about that was a dog going 10 minutes without barking at black people.

Kobe's winning on the ESPY show,

@GreatOdensRaven: He blew it when he failed to return from the World Cup with an African orphan and teach him how to play left tackle for Ole Miss.

@eagleeater12: I bet this guy's life got a lot easier when they caught the Craigslist killer.

@EddieSuttons SouthernComfort: If you can make those letters spell ODEN I may have a buyer for you in Portland.

@Rynocerous: Alternatively you could type Juggs into google and grab a box of kleenex.

Don Cherry describes the lack a of matching tie as amateurish.

According to afterelton cocksuckers watch Glee.

@David Hume: It seems this mess suffers from the problem of too many chiefs and not enough Indians. Hillary better circle the wagons over at the State Department and figure this thing out otherwise there will be some scalps on the line. She needs to sit down with her UK counterpart, smoke a peace pipe and give them…