To be fair to the Twins, it can be daunting playing where the Big Apple is, coming from where the Minneapolis. 

This guy’s the reason my kids wear CCM.

I find it somewhat disgraceful that for several hours people have been commenting on this post and reveling in this man’s misfortune, and not one of you fuckers has coined the term Bradenfreude.

He reminds me of Larry Bird

Which proves the old adage that you should never stick your dick into crazy.

I bet they slept well too, knowing they don’t live in a country whose leader bullies women who try to oppose his efforts to enable international corruption. Or maybe they didn’t, eh?

Lot more time required to learn what a CEO actually does than to regurgitate what this site or the sleeve tattoo that made your latte tells you they do. 

Pretty sure this came from the stands and I got a good look at the four-legged mystery solver who yelled “Rucking Rag it”

The Jets call it the Green & White Scrimmage.

Hate to disappoint but I’ve been to this place and they definitely won’t pee on you. Something about burning those wrists out trying to get off of the next guy in the room who’s obviously turned off by the smell of Cheerios.

Peter Porker

Are you sure about that?

Are we sure those Venezuelans weren’t just checking the boy’s pockets for food?

In rush hour, that’s at least a half-hour drive from downtown.

I don’t care if I have to buy a team and insert my ass in the lineup everyday, I’m getting my four more home runs.

Now trying saying that with a slight Indian accent when you walk into a 7-Eleven or Dunkin Donuts.

It is rumored that one of Donald Trump’s first orders of business will be to walk up to RBG and grab her right in the pussy, just to see if she will disintegrate under her judicial robes much like Obi-wan.

I he were white Deadspin would be asking for help in building a database.

I believe that if we keep trying to increase the percentages of black people in all sports, that we’ll eventually run out of black people.

When asked when he’d like out of Philadelphia, Bradford responded “The sooner, the better”, which coincidentally enough is exactly how the Eagle’s QB depth chart will read following the draft.