50/50 chance of being the next American presidential limo. I wouldn't own it even Ana de Armas and Eva Green took turns as my chauffeuse.

Does it come with a full-time chauffeur who sleeps in a secret compartment underneath the back seats?

Great, now Texas is going to try and annex Arkansas ‘for the safety of Texas-born inhabitants of Arkansas.’

And yet boomers are still commissioning Eleanors and arguing about the number of screws in the headlight covers of Max Max Interceptors.

Doesn’t sound like anything a cheque to the Widows and Orphans Fund can’t fix.

It’ll be extra funny when they try to make American Football sound like a down-home blue-collar sport, when I’d guess you have to be as wealth to own a football team as a F1 team.

Also, are there any equivalent racing series which allow, and therefore encourage, deliberate contact between the cars? Why not just call it a demolition derby and have done with it?

Look at the books little Tammy is holding - way past her reading level.

Paperwork done late on a holiday Friday with the decimal point in the wrong place so the dealer could settle up with another ‘legitimate businessman’?

Did you see the letter ‘R’ after his name? The vast majority of Americans seem to be voting by letter, not by policies or abilities. The real question is, how did his party decide he was the best candidate they had available?

I was thinking, rent an entire train heading for Mexico.

Next week’s life-hack - if you see a an old muscle car running carbs, follow them really closely so your car can ingest the unburnt fuel coming from their exhaust! Ka-ching!

Just put it back on Craigslist: “Ran when moored, no hull kickers (I know what I have), waterline raised for sporty handling, lots of extra fresh water storage in the bottom of the hull. Free tank of diesel!”

I wonder if heavily-armed warlords just shrug their shoulders and laugh it off when you reply to their customer service complaints with a poop emoji.

I imagine the insurers of a $2M car can also invest a few bucks into making sure it was on the up-and-up, too.

Tell me you’re a partner in a provincial gym and low-level drug dealer without telling me...

“Don’t worry, it always makes that noise. You have five hours to make a 450 mile run, don’t break the speed limit.”

The owner may be waiting for a meth head with a Sawzall to cut into the battery, hoping that it’s a catalytic converter, and solve the problem by setting it on fire.

More than my previous vehicle, and slightly more than any of my buddies’ vehicles.

Just a few more tax cuts and a little less regulation of business, I promise...