No, following a tip I learned from Savage Love this week I shall simply smear some Vick's Vapo-Rub in my 'stache before the ride begins.

Does that package in the picture say "Limited Edition Anus Beef?"

Topical!

Is that some kind of dick joke?

I haven't watched the video yet but here's why I hate it…

Mustache rides for everyone!

I wish she posted a new article every day!

Between two cheeks

Oh god, I was sweating inside my generic skeleton mask so bad one year I had to wear it up on my hair.

Hey, you should write a column for the A.V. Club!

No, he gets revived from nearly OD'ing on smack by having panties waved under his nose.

I thought Sweet and Low Down was an awesome and very under-rated Woody Allen movie.

Boy, I hope the voiceover guy got fired over that Pacific Rim job

Well, I'm from Utica and I never heard anyone use the phrase, "steamed hams."

He slaps a little bass

It's not easy being steezey

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming

I waited in the pumpkin patch all night and all I got was this stupid vest!

The men folk don't need help being confused! I think…

I think she's fetch!