Or Troy meeting LeVar Burton.

Oh man, I hated Stepmom.

I loved that part too. Seems like she had a great life and a great dad.

“Then the Chinese couple from across the street came over and said: ‘You released that baby from prison.’ That felt good.””

My daughter changed my super-skeptical, super-logical mind about the paranormal, or at least made me question my beliefs. Thankfully, nothing odd has happened over the last 10-12 years but her preschool years were freaky.

Oooh! I’ve got one!

I had the week off from work. I also had some mental heath issues I was working on. So I didn’t do anything this week that I didn’t want to.

Brag that starts out terrible: I found mold underneath my master bathroom baseboards while painting. I ripped out several feet of baseboard and drywall to get to all the mold, bleached, dried, and covered with primer. In the middle of patching the drywall which was intimidating, but not actually that hard. Also…

I am starting to volunteer with Planned Parenthood this week! I’m so excited and just can’t wait to start. I hope I meet some really awesome people.

As for any other religion, just keep it out of my face and don’t pass laws forcing me to believe and act the way you do, and hey, pay taxes like any other business, and I’m fine with it. Wiccans, in my opinion, are just as silly as Roman Catholics or Buddhists or FSM people or atheists (like me).

Of all the public places to poo, a cornfield is the most appropriate.

I studied abroad in Tours, France during the summer of 2009. This was like a mini study abroad—only a month—but we did homestays and I befriended a group of girls on the trip who were advanced French majors and made some local friends through them, so my French improved a lot.

Screw it, I’m not even gonna make a burner for this. I have no shame. Also I have more stories for this particular pissing contest because my line of work lends itself to it but I’ll stick to this one.

Oh omg this just reminded me so vividly of my own similar experience: I was in college, watching a movie with this guy I was sort of seeing. Not a lot of comfort between us, yet, is what I mean. Still in the hiding our farts phase. But I really liked him. He lived in an old house with a bunch of housemates but they…

“My Baby.”

I thought the one with the girl who dreamed about her dead friend and woke up and the dead friend was laying next to her in bed screaming was the scariest one. That one freaked me the fuck out

When I started out I was working in Chicago as a night editor at a production/post house. The building the company was situated in was an old 7 story (I think, forget the exact number) place that survived the Chicago mafia’s heyday. The place had exposed brick walls, the A/C was obviously added later as it was just…

I’d heard mumblings growing up of a strange incident involving my family and a famous murder, but my grandma refused to discuss it and I knew better than to ask around. After my great-aunt died and left behind 200 pages of memoirs, I finally got the full story.

I was napping in our guest room one Monday morning when I woke up to hearing someone running up and down the stairs, and the swishing of track pants. ‘Give me five minutes Daniel,’ I said, assuming it was my son. Then I sat up with a start - it was Monday. My son was in school. The footsteps and swishing continued. I…

This story happened to my brother (Chris), about two years ago.